Personal Pieces
Inward Journey, darkness into light
I am totally alone. Sitting on a desolate hilltop, there are no lights from the distant valley below, no shadows. I am surrounded by total darkness. I turn my head heavenly and feel more alone still as I stare into the abyss of the infinite blackness of eternal space. There I find no movement or sound to give me direction, there is no wind to push me forward. Here in this desolate place, there can be no inner reflection, no greater understanding, no secrets to be revealed and self-awareness is unattainable.
Yet even in this place of doom, I have a distant feeling that there is something more. I turn my gaze inward and sense an object, still and black as the midnight sky, lying until now unobserved in the place where my heart used to beat. There must be an answer there, there must, yet the harder I struggle to understand the meaning of the object the more elusive it becomes.
In virtual tears, I abandon my desperate search and collapse into a state of abject misery. Discarding all sense of hope I give myself up completely, letting the darkness consume my mind, body, and soul. It is at that moment of absolute defeat that a pinprick of reflective light appears at the edge of the object in my chest. At that very instant the same speck of brightness appears into the midnight sky above, and from this smallest of reflective light their begins to emerge shape and form, the moon has appeared in the blackness above, and I feel the connectedness of this celestial body to the object within me, they are one and the same.
As a razor-thin line of iridescent fire cuts slowly across the new moon both inside and outside of me, the battle between light and darkness plays out. The intense light slowly reveals the surface with great clarity. Each deep scar and crevasse and crater, vast oceans of emotion now motionless and dry, great mountain peaks of happiness and the deep dark valleys of despair and self-inflicted misfortune that has been my life.
I seek through remembering to find the significance of each deep gash and crater and the incredible force or violence that must have created it. I sense also the silent erosion that has creased the moon’s surface from the constant battering by the celestial winds, and my own, a lifetime of experiences which eventually will crease all of our faces. Each new experience taking us farther and farther away from the purity that was our being, our soul, the wide-eyed wonder and curiosity of early childhood.
As more of the moon’s surface is revealed, as is my life story, bathed in new universal light. I try to come to terms with all of these events, there connectedness in time and how one event led invariably to the next. Yet, the more intently that I look upwards and inwards the greater my feelings of remorse and desperation become. How could I have let this happen? Is the Universe so cruel and uncaring? I try and turn my head away as each new piece of my life shows me more of what has been that I cannot change, but my eyes will not waiver. The dark attraction in witnessing my inner pain and suffering is too strong.
I cringe and weep as more and more memories, a huge ocean wave of despair sweeps over me and just as I am certain that I can take no more; suddenly the entire surface of the moon is bathed in brilliant reflective light and my entire life is set before me. My body now bathed in the brightest moonlight trembles and shakes as previously unrecognized feelings of understanding and contentment overcome me.
The moon, inside and out, is full, bright, majestic and powerful when seen in its entirety. The craters and deep scars on the surface could no longer hide the smooth and optimistic surface that lies in between, or the steadfast, solid and enduring inner self that lies beneath.
Unable to control my emotions, my body and soul are swept away in a luminous great river of comprehension and mirth. An unstoppable smile as broad as the night is long, overwhelms my face. I see myself now in my entirety, blemishes, and beauty, crying and in laughter, and as I gaze outward and inward, observing the full naked face of the moon cast against the background of the starlight from countless suns and the infinite power emanating from deep space, I see myself and I am beautiful, one with all things, a true giant reaching with open arms forever deeper, past the moon and into the endless universe beyond.
And just as I thought I might be torn from my worldly body and consumed by the sheer power of acceptance and self-awareness, the face of the man on the moon, my face, raises its eyebrows and winks at me breaking the spell. I find myself once again sitting in the grass, my body silhouetted against a much brighter universe, being just me again, staring contently into the night sky.
37,421 thoughts on “Personal Pieces”
This paragraph is in fact a pleasant one it assists new internet
users, who are wishing in favor of blogging.
where to buy propecia online in canada https://finasteride.blog
You’ve made some really good points there. I checked on the net to
find out more about the issue and found most individuals will go along with your views on this website.
Hello it’s me, I am also visiting this web page on a regular basis, this web page is really pleasant and the people are in fact sharing good
thoughts.
canadian pharmacy digoxin
free money no deposit
casino signup bonus
best online casino real money
Pretty! This has been a really wonderful post. Thank you for supplying this information.
https://propecia.wiki/ propecia what dosage should i take
подъемник мачтовый
https://www.podyemniki-machtovyye-teleskopicheskiye.ru
When someone writes an article he/she keeps the plan of a user
in his/her brain that how a user can know it. Therefore that’s
why this article is amazing. Thanks!
https://stromectolgl.com ivermectin human dose uk
Why people still make use of to read news papers when in this technological globe all is existing on web?
Fastidious answer back in return of this issue with genuine arguments and explaining the whole thing about that.
Excellent way of describing, and good paragraph to obtain information on the topic of my presentation subject, which i am going to convey in academy.
canada ed drugs prescription drugs online without doctor
prescription meds without the prescriptions prescription meds without the prescriptions
Hello, i think that i saw you visited my blog so i came to ?return the favor?.I’m trying to find things to enhance my web site!I suppose its ok to use some of your ideas!!
https://stromectolgl.com ivermectin for humans amazon
female viagra online buy
no deposit slots for real money
win real money online casino
best casino bonus
hide.me vpn
free vpn connection
best free vpn for firestick
buy hydroxychloroquine over the counter https://hydroxychloroquine.bond
canadian pharmacy online prescription drugs online
Good content. Cheers! https://canadianonlinepharmaciesntv.com pharmacy online store http://canadaiandrugservices.com canada pharmacies online
You have made your stand pretty effectively!! https://canadarxdrugservices.com pharmacy online cheap http://rxpharmacyteam.com modafinil online pharmacy
Research papers on aids http://kgti.kg/user/truckmakeup3/
I have read some excellent stuff here. Definitely
worth bookmarking for revisiting. I surprise how much attempt you place
to make such a wonderful informative site.
Very good post! We will be linking to this great post on our
site. Keep up the good writing.
Right here is the perfect site for anyone who wants to understand
this topic. You understand so much its almost tough to argue with you (not that I really would want to…HaHa).
You certainly put a brand new spin on a topic
that has been written about for ages. Wonderful
stuff, just excellent!
Fantastic beat ! I wish to apprentice whilst you amend your site, how could i subscribe for a weblog site? The account helped me a applicable deal. I were tiny bit familiar of this your broadcast provided shiny transparent concept
ivermectin https://stromectolgl.com stromectol lotion cost
I like your writing style truly loving this internet site.
https://ventolinotc.com alternatives to albuterol inhaler
https://ventolinotc.com inhalers for asthma
vpn network
free vpn for windows 10
best vpn for 2022
payday loan
I have been surfing on-line more than 3 hours these days, but I by no means discovered any fascinating article like yours. It is beautiful worth sufficient for me. In my view, if all webmasters and bloggers made good content as you probably did, the web can be a lot more helpful than ever before.
online casino real money
slotos
casino no deposit
how to get prescription drugs without doctor buy prescription drugs online legally
order ivermectin 12mg pills
Remarkable! Its in fact remarkable paragraph, I have got much clear idea concerning from this piece of writing.
https://ventolinotc.com ventolin hfa aer glaxosmith
inhalers for bronchitis https://ventolinotc.com
https://medrxfast.com/# meds online without doctor prescription
where can you buy synthroid
https://stromectolgl.com stromectol
Hi i am kavin, its my first occasion to commenting anyplace,
when i read this paragraph i thought i could also create comment
due to this sensible article.
buy prescription drugs online legally pain medications without a prescription
https://medrxfast.com/# buy canadian drugs
What’s Going down i am new to this, I stumbled upon this I’ve discovered It positively useful and it has aided me out loads.
I’m hoping to give a contribution & aid different
customers like its helped me. Great job.